Moving in Together: 5 Tips Before The Move
By Aimee on
So my partner and I have just recently moved in together. We are both very excited as I have spent the last almost two years living with 3-4 other guys I went to high school with. So below I thought I would put together a few tips that I think are important for before you move in with your loved one, as going from spending heaps of time together to actually living with someone can sometimes be a bit of a shock to the system.
Take an Inventory
Now I think this is a really important one as if you live separately you both will have beds, bedside tables, maybe couches or fridges etc. You both need to know what you have so you can decide together what will come with and what won’t. I only recently bought a beautiful mattress that I wasn’t going to part with but my base wasn’t long enough (it has a foot board and Sam is crazy tall) so we compromised. Sam’s bed base and my mattress. There are things that we are going to have to buy too like a dining table and couches as ours belong either don’t belong to us or are in major need of an upgrade. The key here is to list it and discuss what you can and can’t live without. If you can get past this then you are well on your way.
Look at houses together
This one may seem obvious but something that you like in a house your partner may not like. Or your partner may have something that they feel that they won’t be able to live without. I want a decent bathroom that isn’t pink, Sam wants a gas stove and we would both prefer wooden floors. You also need to make sure you are looking at places within your budget which means you have to have a conversation about what that budget is. Money can be a really tough thing to talk to your partner about but living together won’t work if you aren’t on the same page with this.
Who is going to do what?
Will your partner cook and you do the dishes? Will you share? Who has to do the laundry and clean the bathroom? All very important questions. Someone in the relationship might work more so the other might do the domestic work. You might work equal amounts but at different times which means dinners could be done by one and dishes the other. You may have an equal share in all domestic duties or one of you may hate vacuuming so you agree the other person does this. Domestic duties can begin to be a problem if it is very one sided. I’m lucky that so far we share most duties, Sam opting for cooking dinner and me opting for cleaning the bathroom. I do hate the dishes but his food is so good I will help tidy up afterwards.
Let’s talk money
I know that I have already mentioned budget of house so this does come under that but you also need to talk about how you split up payments of other things like food and electricity for example. Are you earning an equal amount or different, will you both pay half of everything or only some things. I believe talking about how money is spent and what you are saving for as well is really crucial to making a household work. I have heard of stories where one of the people in the couple was giving money to his parents without consulting with his partner which created a real problem. All I’m saying is don’t keep money a secret, because as sad as it is that it can make life stressful, it will only get worse if you don’t talk about it. I think it is a great idea to write down what your income is and what comes out (phone bill, car insurance, loans, registrations etc.) and then divvy up what is left over for rent, food, electricity, and subscriptions. We can’t forget about Netflix here people! Then SAVE! SAVE! SAVE! Oh, and have fun too.
Date Night
Now that you are living/about to live together and spending all this time together I think the last crucial element is date night. Now I know that I just said that you are spending all this time together but honestly once you start living together that time doesn’t always have the same quality to it. We all need our down time, where we just chill. But that can turn into a habit where its always just Netflix or reading or asking each other how their day was and going back to the computer. I know that Sam and I are already a bit guilty of this. We are busy people and like to just relax at the end of a hard day. Sam and I will always have dinner at the table without the use of electronics. This can sometimes be hard as I know that I’m addicted to my phone but we do make an effort every night to have a proper conversation and spend good quality time talking to each other. Now good quality time isn’t always dinner, sometimes it’s going out, maybe a picnic, maybe a walk, maybe bowling or sex. It is up to you obviously. But do make time for that ‘date night’ that you used to do before you moved in together, and make it a little special. Your relationship will be better for it.
Honestly I think it all comes down to communication. Talk to your partner about the above things and I think life is easier and happier with less stress. Now go and enjoy your new place together and let me know about how you have chosen to decorate. 😃